How to Create a Stronger Partnership with Your Horse: 1 Simple Exercise to Try Today

Are you looking to build a better partnership with your horse? In this post, I’ll share one simple exercise that can significantly improve the bond you share with your horse—boosting your relationship and making your time together more fulfilling.

Why Building a Partnership with Your Horse Matters

If you’ve ever tried to make your horse do something they didn’t want to, you know that physical force is not the answer. While horses may physically comply with commands, they can mentally check out and disengage. The difference between a horse that’s merely going through the motions and one that is fully invested in the partnership is *huge*. In this post, we’ll explore how to create a genuine connection with your horse and build a partnership that lasts.

What Does a Horse Partnership Mean?

Before you can build a meaningful connection, it's essential to define what a partnership with your horse looks like. Horses, just like humans, can have different relationships with us. Some people want a horse that relies on them for everything, while others seek a horse that can take care of them or even teach them new things.

Many horse owners (myself included) strive for something like the bond between Maverick and Goose in *Top Gun*—where both individuals bring their strengths to the table and elevate each other. But, let's be real, at times we may also aim for a more *Frodo and Sam* type of connection, where there’s a balance of vulnerability and support.

Understanding Our Role in the Horse-Human Partnership

In a horse-human relationship, horses are dependent on us for nearly everything—food, shelter, care, and guidance. On the other hand, we have control over nearly every aspect of their lives. This dynamic of dependence and control can affect the health of the partnership, so it’s crucial to approach it with awareness.

How to Create a Healthy Relationship with Your Horse

For any relationship to thrive, a balanced give and take is essential. In a healthy partnership:

• Both parties maintain an individual identity

• Emotions and needs can be expressed freely and without judgment.

• Both parties feel safe and secure.

• Each party can say “no” without guilt.

By applying these principles, you can start transforming your bond with your horse into a healthier, more cooperative partnership.

Reflecting on Your Values to Strengthen Your Bond

If you’re not seeing the results you want in your relationship with your horse, it may be because your actions don’t align with your core values. By reflecting on what truly matters to you, you can shift your focus and create positive change.

I’ve created a Values Worksheet to help you reflect on your values and how they apply to your horse partnership. My core values are mindfulness, curiosity, openness, courage, and trust. As you go through the worksheet, think about which values resonate with you, and how they can guide your interactions with your horse.

Turning Values into Actions

Once you’ve identified your core values, the next step is to turn them into actions. Horses challenge us, sometimes pushing us to make tough decisions. By acting according to our values, we can be more confident in our choices, even when faced with difficulties.

The Power of Values in Building a Strong Partnership

I’ll share a story from my early days with my horse, Mosa, when I was completely over-horsed. I tried everything, from traditional methods to natural horsemanship, but nothing worked. One day, I had an epiphany during an equine therapy session, where I learned the importance of being *present* and *authentic* with my horse. By embracing mindfulness, curiosity, and trust, I started to see real change in our relationship.

This story highlights the importance of acting in alignment with your values, and how it can positively impact your connection with your horse.

Applying Your Values to Everyday Tasks

Once you’ve defined your values, it’s time to put them into practice. You can use them to navigate everyday tasks and solve problems with your horse. For example, if you’re faced with the challenge of giving your horse months off from riding, your values can help you reframe the situation as an opportunity for growth.

Actionable Steps to Strengthen Your Horse Partnership

To create a stronger partnership with your horse, follow these steps:

1. Define what partnership means to you. What kind of relationship do you want with your horse?

2. Identify your core values. Download the Values Worksheet and reflect on your values.

3. Align your actions with your values. How can you apply these values in your interactions with your horse?

4. Use your values to navigate challenges. When faced with a difficult situation, let your values guide your response.

5. Check in regularly. Keep your values visible and revisit them to ensure you’re staying true to your vision.

Conclusion: Building a Strong, Lasting Horse Partnership

The journey to a better partnership with your horse takes time, effort, and patience. By embracing your core values, you can navigate challenges and create a meaningful, fulfilling relationship. Remember, it’s okay if things aren’t perfect—what matters is your commitment to improving and deepening your bond with your horse.

Download your free Values Worksheet and take the first step toward creating a better relationship with your horse. I’d love to hear about your values and how they’ve helped improve your partnership. Join the conversation in the comments below or connect with us in our Facebook group, “Equine Connection with Head Heart Horse.”